Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
