Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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