we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
