I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
