What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
