WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
