I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
