think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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