sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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