I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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