I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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