just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
