Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
