Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
