I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
