Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
