I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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