I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
