i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
