i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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