chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
