Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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