I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
