Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize