hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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