I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
