I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize