I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
