I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
