She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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