Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
