I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
"it" just moved
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Randomize
