Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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