Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
