He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
