Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
