Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
True strength comes from lack of pants
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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