every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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