I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
My Higher Power is John Stamos
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
