Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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