"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
