nut hugger
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
