i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
