You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
