yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
My balls are so social today.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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