He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
