Someone shit on the floor
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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