i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The uberlube is also flammable
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
