I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
