so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
