Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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