it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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